Living alone; what to expect
How you guys are doing? Hope your day had a nice kick start!
I am writing this piece for the lovely people out there who are going to set your sail for higher studies or jobs in different cities far away from home. I know you might be very excited or overwhelmed about that near future.
I really think everyone should stay alone once in a lifetime because not only that makes you responsible and self dependent, it helps to develop your personality and let you know yourself better. Also living far away from your family actually helps you to value them better.
I wanted to share my experience of living alone. I am jotting down few things that you might expect and prepare yourself for. But first, don’t worry it’s gonna be worth it 🙂
You know security might be the first point that is in your parents’ mind once your moving was decided and don’t think your dad is overreacting, it is important. . Keep few points in mind:
- if you are not staying in any company or institution provided accommodation and looking for a rented one, please check for the security details first. Trust me, a well guarded society will prove to better than a fancy one in long run. Who doesn’t want to sleep in peace!
- Try to accompany your female colleague or classmate if she is travelling alone at night (All with good intentions please!)
- Try to make a habit of mentioned or informing one or two people about your whereabouts and once you have reached home. This is going to come handy if you are in trouble and could not reach in time.
If you are hiding your destination from your parents (because face it! we all do it.) , mention it to your friends/ partner or at least leave a note somewhere.
- Text the cab number or any other tiny details if you have to travel alone at night. you can be in a call the whole time with someone, of course after keeping eye on the rode.
The next big thing is going to be money. Yes this might be the reason you left you cozy home and working your a** off! Spending money can be tricky. I had a bank account of big zero before I realized that spending so much on Starbucks and online shopping can be a little risque!
- Try to monitor your spending habits. You can move a portion from your earning to different account or any other savings scheme if you are not so dependable with money in the account like me 🙁
- Try not to lend money or buy stuff on credit, this sometimes bring you to embarrassing situations.
- Try to jot down you spending. Writing helps in remembering the dues.
In one point of time, your are going to share room or flat with some other person. Oh how I though it would be so fun like Rachel and Monica in Friends! But hey, the last roommate I had drove me crazy because I did not share my office laptop with her to let her binge watch some Korean daily at night in it! I finally had to move to a single accommodation where I slept on a mattress on stone cold floor but contended with peace of mind (Thank God!).
Jokes apart guys! living with a stranger under the same roof is not easy.
- Please be considerate and try to adjust. Just remind your self that she does not have the same upbringing or background as yours and she is also trying!
- Discuss with him/her your timing, your food habits or anything major prior moving in with.
- Set the rules of who is going to pay the bills this month or who is going to do the dishes clearly.
- Try not be extremely sloppy! I know it’s fun but lets not bury your roommate under your dirty underwear!
- Last but not the least, if you want to say no, say NO.
Easy for you people who are praised for their culinary skills! I was humiliated for washing the okra after cutting it and for not being able to differentiate between the different spices. But you know what, it was fun learning it while tagging along with my roommates when they were cooking. Apparently I was too slow to peel potatoes! Believe me or not, I used to cooked dinner for all of them at the end of the year.
- Do not be a lazy bum. share the house work. I learn this in a hard way. Even if you can not do it, you can ask people to show you how.
- Divide work between yourselves.
- Make a point to learn at least basic cooking. This is going to be your savior guys!
- Try to clean your room at least once in a week . Take the responsibility to clean the mess you have created for the little celebration you had when your friend was away.
This might be the part that you are looking forward to. To be able to drink, sleep, eat to your heart’s desire. I gotta tell you, I was also looking forward to it. Really, all the work and stress is so worth it for the fun part it has. To be able to plan a girl’s night out without any concern is so much fun! To plan a sudden trip, to go crazy with friends, those are the memory we treasure after all. And what are hostel days without a little crazy fun?
I have nothing new to tell you guys which has not already been told. Just want to remind you, don’t overdo it 🙂 Just keep a little check on yourself and you will taste the freedom at it’s best.
Yes you have left your family and your safety cocoon. Friends are all you got. And let me tell you guys! If you choose wisely, they are no less than your family. Friends are possibly the most important point when you are living far from your home. I am going to give you one rule which I maintained.
Make few, make true! The ones you can trust with sick stomach to come up with soup!
Your living alone will be super fun if you got your like minded people by your side.
But one thing I want to mention here, if you planning to have a house party or sleep over, please be considerate to your flatmate or roommate. Please always make sure to ask him / her if they are comfortable.
I used be the little bookish nerd in the verge of being unsocial. I gotta tell you, it’s hard to be an introvert person when you are out alone in the big wide world! I know how cozy and comfortable you can get in your blissful solitude, but communication is necessary for both good and bad situations.
- Compliment someone, it’s free! Talk to people, communicate!
- Speak up. If you have problem with nose picking habit of your roommate, tell him! Don’t keep a grudge.
- No one’s going to speak for you in this world other than you. So take a stand for yourself.
- Please, understand the difference of speaking your mind and being rude to the other person, many don’t.
- Always make a point to be in constant communication with your home. Remember the days your father stood by the end of your bed at night if you sneezed more than once? Yes they still care!
I know it might look like a little out of the topic but trust me, this is going to be a major part of your life if you want. Pick up a hobby! You always wanted to learn swimming? Join local club. Join cooking classes or learn new languages. Whatever interests you. Give time to yourself. At the end of the day you will be living with you and once you love your own company, you are never bored. 🙂
That’s all guys. I think that would be enough. Don’t be scared. It’s so going to be worth it, an experience you will live by and memory you would cherish, I am sure.
As Monica’s said “Welcome to the real world. It sucks. You‘re gonna love it. ” 🙂
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